Why Emulating Oxford University in the US Is an Errand for Fools
June 11, 2025
Just a dinobaby and no AI: How horrible an approach?
I read an essay with the personal touches I admire in writing: A student sleeping on the floor, an earnest young man eating KY fry on a budget airline, and an individual familiar with Laurel and Hardy comedies. This person write an essay, probably by hand on a yellow tablet with an ink pen titled “5 Ways to Stop AI Cheating.”
What are these five ways? The ones I noted are have rules and punish violators. Humiliation in front of peers is a fave. Presumably these students did not have weapons or belong to a street gang active in the school. The other five ways identified in the essay are:
- Handwrite everything. No typewriters, no laser printers, and no computers. (I worked with a fellow on a project for Persimmon IT which did some work on the DEC Alpha, and he used computers. (Handwriting was a no go for interacting with the DECs equipped with the “hot” chip way back when.)
- Professors interact with a student and talk or interrogate the young scholar to be
- Examinations were oral or written. One passed or failed. None of this namby pamby “gentleman’s C” KY fry stuff
- Inflexibility about knowing or not knowing. Know and one passes. Not knowing one becomes a member of Parliament or a titan of industry
- No technology. (I would not want to suggest that items one and five are redundant and that would be harshly judged by some of my less intellectually gifted teachers at assorted so-so US institutions of inferior learning.
Now let’s think about the fool’s errand. The US is definitely a stratified society, just like the UK. If one is a “have,” life is going to be much easier than if one is a “have not.” Why? Money, family connections, exposure to learning opportunities, possibly tutors, etc. In the US, technology is ubiquitous. I do not want to repeat myself, so a couple of additional thoughts will appear in item five below.
Next, grilling a student one on one is something that is an invitation to trouble. A student with hurt feelings need only say, “He/she is not treating me fairly.” Bingo. Stuff happens. I am not sure about a one on one in a private space would be perceived by a neutral third party. If one has to meet, meet in a public place.
Third, writing in blue books poses two problems. The first is that the professor has to read what the student has set forth in handwriting. Second, many students can neither write legible cursive or print out letters in an easily recognizable form. These are hurdles in the US. Elsewhere, I am not sure.
Fourth, inflexibility is a characteristic of some factions in the US. However, helicopter parents and assorted types of “outrage” can make inflexibility for a public servant a risky business. If Debbie is a dolt, one must find a way to be flexible if her parents are in the upper tier of American economic strata. Inflexibility means litigation or some negative networking or a TikTok video.
Finally, the problem with the no-tech approach is that it just won’t work. Consider smart software. Teachers use it and have LLMs fix up “original research.” Students use it to avoid reading and writing. Some schools ban mobile devices. Care to try that at an American university when shooters can prowl the campus?
The essay, like the fantasies of people who want to live like those in Florence in the 15th century are nuts. Pestilence, poverty, filth, violence, and big time corruption— there were everyday companions.
Cheating is here to stay. Politician is a code word for crook. Faculty (at least at Harvard) is the equivalent of bad research. Students are the stuff of YouTube shorts. Writing in blue books? A trend which may not have the staying power of Oxford’s stasis. I do like the bookstore, however.
Stephen E Arnold, June 11, 2025
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